Happy Friday! Time for another birth story. This series is going really well and I hope that people are enjoying it. Everyone I've spoken to who has written their story said it was really empowering. I'm always looking for people to contribute. Email me if you or someone you know might be interested.
The third and final story from my mum and it's mine.
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Baby number 4 was supposed to arrive on the 16/02/93. My Mum
wanted a Valentine’s Day baby, I just wanted my baby as soon as possible. This
had been my worst pregnancy. I had been sick all the way through, I had to have
a glucose test in case I had pregnancy diabetes, I didn’t they were just big
babies. I was anaemic due to a mix up between the G.P and hospital concerning
iron tablets and I had three other children. I had terrible back ache and had
to have several scans because at one point baby was transverse, so was laying
across my tummy. I was laying threatened
with a c section, they tried to turn baby but that didn’t work. However, at the
last minute baby turned. Hurray, or so I thought, little did I know. By now
they could tell if baby was a boy or girl, but I elected not to know as I had
not known with the older three children. I think my husband would have liked to
have known, but hey it was me having this baby so it’s MY decision. I did have
a suspicion that baby was a girl though because the lady doing the scan said “I
expect your little girl would like a sister wouldn’t she?”
I woke at about 5AM on
the morning of the 9th of February with sharp pains. Oh good I thought
here by lunch time, home by tea time because I was booked in for 6 hours and my
previous labours had been quick. By 8 o’clock the contractions had slowed. A
neighbour had said she would take the 2 older children to school and would meet
them and look after them if needed, leaving me with a 3 year old. My husband
then decided that he was going to work!!!! As things had slower down. Don’t forget
we didn’t have mobile phones then. “What!” I said, “You can’t leave me here
with a toddler.” “Oh it’s ok.” He said “Your mum and sister are on their way.”
My lovely mum and sister turned up on their bikes. Mum
stayed until 3pm and then went home to prepare the beds for her 3
grandchildren. My sister stayed until 5pm when my husband returned home. I told
him we needed to go to the hospital. I phoned and was told to come in. We
collected the 2 older children from the neighbour and together with the toddler
dropped them off at Mum’s and made for the hospital. It was now about 6:30pm
and 1 was still expecting to have baby fairly quickly once I got there. Ha ha,
no such luck. I was by now in agony.
This was certainly the most painful birth, so they gave me
the gas and air and were quite shocked that I didn’t know how to use it. I had
not needed it with the others. Then they took it away from me as I was getting
too high on it. I remember feeling very annoyed about that. My baby was not
making very good progress along the birth canal, but was not distressed so they
decided to leave her alone, but for some reason she seemed stuck. The midwife
looked and said she is facing the wrong way, looking up instead of down. It was
now 9pm and my midwife should have gone home, but he said she was staying until
this baby made an appearance. They told me that because this way my fourth
child everything down there was stretched (charming) and that would help.
At 9:59, with no forceps or intervention, a baby girl
arrived. They had told me she would not be large like her brother. Well they
were right she wasn’t so big. Only 10lb 6oz! We hadn’t decided on her name so
for 3 days she was just baby Daws until the nurses pleaded with me to give her
a name. We decided on Cathryn Laura. My Dad had passed away during my pregnancy
and Laura had been his Mum’s (My Nanny’s) name. It was also my Husbands Nanny’s
name so it pleased both families. My husband wanted to go and phone the Mum’s
with the news of the birth but they made him stay because I needed a bath and
they didn’t have enough staff to stay with me. In those days if a baby was born
at night they kept it in the nursery so as not to disturb the other mums on the
ward.
About 3am they came and told me by baby was being
transferred to S.C.B.U (Special Care Baby Unit) because she was having
difficulty breathing, but not too worry. Of course I did. In the morning when
the babies came through from the nursery, mine didn’t. The nurses said she was
ok and would be on the ward shortly. Still no baby. Eventually they let me got
to S.C.B.U to see her. I was told that she had a stridor in her throat which
vibrated when she had a bottle, it made an awful noise. They didn’t know if the
breathing problems were caused by the fact she didn’t realise she had to take
breaths every now and again while feeding or because she had so many rolls of
fat on her neck that she couldn’t support her head when feeding.
We were told that Cathryn might have to be transferred to a
bigger, more specialised hospital if she didn’t improve. After 3 days I made the
difficult decision to go home leaving Cathryn behind. I had 3 children at home
who were upset and being looked after by my Mum and sister. They needed me too.
But the drama didn’t end there. Oh no! One night at 10pm
after we visited Cathryn. I had bad tummy pains and increased blood loss. My
mum who had been babysitting said to phone the emergency doctor, who wasn’t
very helpful and told me to wait and see the midwife. Mum said keep any large
clots to show the midwife (yuck) because she thought it was bits of the
placenta. She was right, it was. The midwife said that it was ok because the
pans and bleeding had stopped.
Luckily after 3 days we were allowed to bring Cathryn home.
She had learnt to feed and breath and the stridor disappeared after a few
months. As we left the S.C.B.U I thought this is it. No more babies. I can’t do
this again and I’m not coming back. I didn’t until 22 years later at the birth
of Cathryn’s daughter Edith.
Cathryn, I am loving these posts. As a childless woman these stories are a mix of damn scary and totally inspiring. Every single time I read one of these I get a little scared of the whole process but by the end of them I end up all teary at how much love the mums all clearly feel for their babies. I can only imagine what that must feel like.
ReplyDeleteSuch a good series!
B x
Thank you so much for your comment. This came at the perfect time for me. I've been thinking for ages about turning these stories into a book and this comment was the kick in the right direction I needed. Thank you!
DeleteI am loving your series! It's really interesting reading about someone's experiences X
ReplyDeletewww.sheintheknow.co.uk
Thank you. It really means a lot :)
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