Life itself is one big balancing act, and nothing is harder to balance than motherhood and marriage. You don’t discover you can split your heart and your love until you have your first child, and the love your heart can hold only gets bigger as you have more children. It’s not easy, balancing loving your spouse with loving your children. It’s an easy thing for your heart to feel but trying to balance your life as a wife with your life is a mother is a challenge.
Children are selfish by nature. That’s not a slight on them, they’re small and demanding and their demands can sometimes come first even before your own health and hygiene. This selfishness can sometimes breed resentment in a marriage, as before the children came along it was easy to put each other first for everything. Adjusting to putting someone else’s needs even before yourselves is hard and it’s important to recognise that before you have a family. Communication is the biggest key for a happy marriage so before you head to Diamond Queensland to choose that fate-sealing engagement ring, make sure you discuss your family desires. Discuss your feelings on how you would handle certain situations that pull you away from each other and understand that these early baby days are not forever.
If you can make peace with putting most of your marriage on pause, you’ll sail through early babyhood. That’s not to say you won’t make time to talk, to kiss and to love each other, but love comes in more than just the physical and by making it through babyhood, you can guarantee you can get through anything. Broken sleep and working can put pressures on a marriage like nothing else as exhaustion can cause you to snipe at one another. This is not okay but it’s the nature of human frustration to lash out. Recognise your pitfalls as soon as you can, apologise as soon as you can and agree to move forward together. If you are partners and tackle every issue by discussing calmly, you’ll be able to mature and grow together in parenthood.
All life is a balancing act but if you can master the balance between spouse and child, you’re a genius! It’s all about communication and making time. Make your husband a cup of tea in the evening after work. Let him feed the baby while you have a hot shower. Never ever feel like you cannot ask for help; if you don’t and try and do it all yourself, you’ll end up resenting him for not helping. It’s important to be helped and help where you can and it’s important to remember that there will be a day your children fly the nest. You don’t want to find out you’re left with a stranger that looks like an older version of the person you married. Discover things together, play and have fun being the people you always have been. Keep the balance.
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